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I've been on break for 6 days, and I'm feeling so uncomfortable with having nothing to do that I'm ready to go back already. I'm hoping that this gets better once other people start getting done with finals and coming home, but otherwise my solution is to be out of town as much as possible- for example, this week, I am hanging out with my grandparents in Tuscaloosa, Alabama.
Tuscaloosa, as you probably know, is home to the University of Alabama Crimson Tide. Ranked #1 in the BCS and probably 2009 D1 national champions. They're also the sworn arch-enemies of the University of Tennessee Volunteers, and I don't blame them- UT orange has some pretty killer side effects, namely migraine headaches and burned retinas. And while we beat Bama in academics, Tide-ans(?) can find solace in the fact that their campus is aesthetically superior to ours in every single way, with the exception of the law school.
My grandparents are die-hard Alabama fans. My grandma worked for the law school for 30 years, my mom and her siblings all went to Bama, everything here is red, and my grandmother talks about Crimson Tide football players like they are her own children. This, combined with the fact that my dad's whole family went to Vandy or Auburn, is why nobody was all that excited when I picked Tennessee over my other two choices (Colorado State or Auburn). Not that my family has been unsupportive, mind you, but I have family members email me Tennessee jokes on a regular basis. This is fine with me, especially since I usually have a wide array of jokes to throw back in their faces.
But I tell you this, friends, I have been to every SEC football stadium with the exception of LSU and both Mississippi schools, and none have overwhelmed me quite like Bryant-Denny stadium. This is partly because my brother and I decided to go exploring on a misty, foggy Alabama night, and couldn't find the stadium until it rose up out of the mist like some sort of alien spacecraft.
Star Trek Enterprise or Bryant Denny Stadium? I know, I know, it's hard to tell.
Anyway, aside from my suspicions about the worldly origins of Nick Saban and/or Mark Ingram, Tuscaloosa is alive with excitement. In fact, when we got here, my grandparents spent the first 30 minutes talking about the SEC championship game and Alabama's victory over Tennessee ("We weren't worried about that last field goal attempt. We knew Saban had a plan"). And on Saturday, Alabama got its first ever Heisman winner in Ingram (despite the school's having won 12 national championships). This was exciting to me insomuch as it meant that Tebow didn't win, but notsomuch in that it nullified the only new Alabama joke I had up my sleeve:
This of course, was not going to fly, so my desperate plea for help via facebook had my friend Matt text me with a backup joke:
And kids, it is so very, very, very true.
Tuscaloosa, as you probably know, is home to the University of Alabama Crimson Tide. Ranked #1 in the BCS and probably 2009 D1 national champions. They're also the sworn arch-enemies of the University of Tennessee Volunteers, and I don't blame them- UT orange has some pretty killer side effects, namely migraine headaches and burned retinas. And while we beat Bama in academics, Tide-ans(?) can find solace in the fact that their campus is aesthetically superior to ours in every single way, with the exception of the law school.
My grandparents are die-hard Alabama fans. My grandma worked for the law school for 30 years, my mom and her siblings all went to Bama, everything here is red, and my grandmother talks about Crimson Tide football players like they are her own children. This, combined with the fact that my dad's whole family went to Vandy or Auburn, is why nobody was all that excited when I picked Tennessee over my other two choices (Colorado State or Auburn). Not that my family has been unsupportive, mind you, but I have family members email me Tennessee jokes on a regular basis. This is fine with me, especially since I usually have a wide array of jokes to throw back in their faces.
But I tell you this, friends, I have been to every SEC football stadium with the exception of LSU and both Mississippi schools, and none have overwhelmed me quite like Bryant-Denny stadium. This is partly because my brother and I decided to go exploring on a misty, foggy Alabama night, and couldn't find the stadium until it rose up out of the mist like some sort of alien spacecraft.
Star Trek Enterprise or Bryant Denny Stadium? I know, I know, it's hard to tell.
Anyway, aside from my suspicions about the worldly origins of Nick Saban and/or Mark Ingram, Tuscaloosa is alive with excitement. In fact, when we got here, my grandparents spent the first 30 minutes talking about the SEC championship game and Alabama's victory over Tennessee ("We weren't worried about that last field goal attempt. We knew Saban had a plan"). And on Saturday, Alabama got its first ever Heisman winner in Ingram (despite the school's having won 12 national championships). This was exciting to me insomuch as it meant that Tebow didn't win, but notsomuch in that it nullified the only new Alabama joke I had up my sleeve:
"Why did OJ hide out in Tuscaloosa? Because they'd never expect to find a Heisman winner there!"
This of course, was not going to fly, so my desperate plea for help via facebook had my friend Matt text me with a backup joke:
"What do a maggot and an Alabama fan have in common? They've been feeding on the same dead Bear for 30 years"
And kids, it is so very, very, very true.
Now, you might want to check out the new issue of
U.S. News and World Report to see how Tennessee
ranks vs. Alabama, academically and overall. Don't go around testing your "elders" knowledge of
colleges. There is a lot more to Alabama than
football. OF COURSE, THAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT
THING!!!!!